Moored
1y 1mon ago by literature.cafe/u/dnqxt in originalpoetry@literature.cafe from literature.cafe
I'm just starting with writing, and it feels a bit cluttered. So any pointers would be appreciated!!! Thank you
Graf vision here. Good rhythm, the structure is musical. Succinct and quite evocative. I like it.
I would only question if you meant deliberate? And if you would like to go with adrifts or adrift?
I like the imagery of a murmur coiled like a frail animal on the edge of something.