indoor mushroom farming
11d 6h ago by lemmy.world/u/Karmanopoly in lemmyshitpost
Penis
Hats off to your lady-friends
... Speed run challenge of hanging a hat on each one.
I'm envious.
Like Freud predicted you would be
Master understatement.
Opening the post and seeing only the image and your comment just sent me, thanks for the laugh!
Finally. The mush room.
Take my upvote...
Ah yes, the Great Wall of Dong.
More like great hall of vagina dong.
Online dating
It almost looks like you’d expect the walls to start closing like one of those spiked wall traps.
Womb Raiders
But instead of impaling you they just sort of... Squish up against you. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't even feel bad. In fact, you're starting to kinda like it...
Then they start jizzing all over everything
Mush pit.
The penis corridor
today i learned i comprehend spanish
Cockridor
I'm sorry, but it's obviously corridong
Every hot girls DMs be like...
Having grown Oysters, and Shiitakes before wondering why these are all growing towards the floor... typical mushrooms I'm aware of still orient towards a light source despite not needing it for food just to ensure their spores are spread properly....
Were they flipped? Does the green floor have something to do with it? Is it fake?
Could it be good ole gravity? Growing too far out from the wall to support their own weight properly?
Yeah, it seems very likely to be their weight.
They just need someone to spit on them and call them dirt.
Are oysters and shiitakes easy? I did Teachers and they were soooooo simple, it was fascinating! It’d be nice to have some just to eat for yum and not expedience.
Oysters are probably the easiest edibles to grow. Shiitakes on the other hand, I am just cursed even though they shouldn't be hard. If you had success with Teachers, Oysters aren't a problem.
Thank you, I’ll look into that! I’d love more stuff at home that I can make vegan meals with for friends who don’t eat animal products (and I just love eating mushrooms!)
Are teachers that easy? I've only ever done albino tidal waves, and not only do they take like 6 months to grow but they always find a way to fuck something up and I end up with 10 grams per canopy. Life is suffering with ATWs.
Oh yah, all it takes is a plastic tub with a latching lid and a fine mist spritzer! The first time I did super poorly but had pins in a couple weeks, and got a couple flushes (which I harvested way too late.)
Another try and the first flush was WAY more thicc, got about seven flushes over the course of two or three months before I stopped them. Just threw em in a room with no special light or anything, just spritzed twice a day or so. Barely touched them or did anything, just went in to wet em a little and admire them occasionally. They were extremely self-sufficient!
Took ages to dry, but once completely dried out, easily 120+g total from the second batch!
If you order a spawn block of shiitake or oyster they are pretty easy indoors in my experience. Outdoor shiitake making my first attempt wont likely know until fall of 2027
Outdoors takes that long?! Wild! Teachers were flushin’ in like a month or two. Good luck on your outdoor grow! :3
I used dowel plugs instead of sawdust as first attempt so a bit slower but easier to avoid contamination from what I read. Also depends on the size of the logs, weather conditions, how heavily you inoculate, etc. Have a winter season here where the shiitakes are likely to go dormant. Might see something earlier than that but if I don't see anything by winter 2027 will assume it has likely failed. If it goes well should have a number of years of production though.
They aren't gonna suck themselves.
Well... I don't know about the rest of you guys but I've just uncovered a new fantasy
I think I need more details on this one.
😵💫 🫠
Mushroom farming management: keep them in the dark and feed them shit
uhm ... u wanna run for president next?
I think you grow king trumpet on sawdust, agaricus species are the dung loving one's
Do NOT fondle the wall of dongs.
... at least not without first asking the fungal gestalt consciousness for consent first.
Ok, also, someone needs to overlay this with the green screened, joe pesci 'what the fuck is this piece of shit?' shot/reverese shot thing.
This, but not shit tier quality:
you'd need a second background image but yeah
... maybe use a shot of the infinite hallway of literal 'backdoors' from the 2nd/3rd matrix movies, i think that would work, just color grade it a bit.
Oglaf: Escape Room (NSFW)
gestalt
"gestalt". when you want to sound exotic even though you could have just said "shape" or "form"
edit: "system" or "organism" or "entity" could have worked as well
Ah yes the phallus palace
I still don't exactly understand what the fuck mushrooms are.
Relevant XKCD:
Understandable, they're neither animals nor plants, and at least to me, that's really weird. Pretty much everything large enough to see fits into those categories, and it just feels like fungi should be plants as well.
I just googled a bit about this topic and learned algae is also not a plant. But it's green! 
You should check out kelp next. It's not a plant either.
Isn't that a type of algae?
I guess you also count minerals as plants?
Depends. Is it green?
Copper is now a plant.
God dam ea-nasir and his oxidized copper
The ancient shamans of metal approve of this message.
Swear to god, your name and avatar is apparently a sound i can hear.
Started playing in my head when I saw you pop up.
... ... I'm gonna blame the mushrooms.
Honestly I would've thought the track Metal Monks (BoS theme) would fit better what with my profile picture being Pelinal Whitestrake a literal crusader and cyborg a metal monk if you will.
Well, I'm apparently not in charge of my ... conditional synesthesia?
I figured it would be Metal Monks too, but I had to actually check the track names.
I was just considering living things here, but fair point
mushrooms are just eucaryotic species that never bothered to develop legs or brains (and also no photosynthesis) . if they want to go somewhere, they either grow a thin wire to get there or throw a million spores into the air and hope that one lands where it should be going to.
Fun fact, it's very likely that without mushrooms land animals wouldn't exist. More controversially it's possible that without mushrooms no creatures with higher order thinking like human variants could exist.
stoned ape theory mentioned
(citation needed)
Sure thing, my undereducated comrade.
Fungi (or protofungi) were likely the first large multi-cellular life on land, predating plants by at least a half billion years and creating the soil conditions necessary for plants to make the jump from the ocean. In fact plant life without fungal symbiosis on land likely would have been impossible.
As to the second part, while it's controversial in some circles that lean heavily toward divine creation or intervention, the Stoned Ape Theory is nonetheless pretty well supported. As for my exact wording; I'm also including dolphins, which do recreational drugs anyway, and suggesting outside popular theories there's a sea fungus they've keyed in on in the past, as well as octopi who like to get high, even crows like a little chemical help now and again. While we don't have direct evidence of non-ape species being particularly into eating fungus for its mind altering effects, the fact that pretty much every 'intelligent' species seems to enjoy recreational mind-altering drugs does point to a common origin for intelligence itself.
That just makes you wanna give shrooms to animals to see if any develop higher intelligence
xD but for the fungus to activate these parts of the brain that form language etc, these parts would have to be there in the first place. it doesn't make much sense to develop a brain and then depend on external substances to activate them. also it would be a huge disadvantage to not just always enable them, which nature surely could have done, and probably did.
Motherfucker you got your answer. Stop arguing with scientists.
i'm not sure whether you're serious. science is a process. it's meant to continuously question everything.
Lmao yeah, science is a process. One that your inane ramblings have fuck all to do with.
You're a contrarian weirdo who asked for information, got it, then argued. Because it's ostensibly all you have to offer.
Edit: Oops I missed the instance, typical feddit horseshit.
the reason why i argued is because i found it inconsistent.
Stop taking Science as a religion. Questioning theories is the foundation of science. If there is an answer, somebody will be happy to provide it. If there is none then we have to look more closely.
As if you are such a scientist. Academia would have instilled manners in you. Whatever you are, please don't tarnish the reputation of science any longer. People will stop taking it serious, which is dangerous with global warming and skipped vaccinations.
Why?
The first step before we get 40k orks
Does anyone?
penisfactory
This picture is still less gay than the Trump football AI post.
S P O R E
In the air
Wall-o-Dicks
Glory Wall
We’ll make you a winner yet
Assuming this is real, that mofo needs a gas mask. There is no way breathing that many spores ends well.
Your mom in college.
I just hope they don’t start squirting.
This is actually kind of interesting to me because I hadn't ever considered they would be grown vertically like that as opposed to racks stacked on top of each other.
The presidential micro penis wall, now at 40X zoom for all your viewing pleasures. The registry starts after WW3 during the dictatorship of the one pedo called orange. Today in 5673 we can only thank our ancestors for our very large penises. After only a few thousand T presidential specimens a new family took over such that today we have advanced cellphone technology! We have even developed "thecar"!
The presidential micro penis wall,
I don't know how big your penis is, but these don't look micro to me.
They shrink you down so you can see them up close, like Fantastic Voyage.
now at 40X zoom
We have even developed "thecar"!
It's all ... computer!
hmmm
Ok hear me out. The backrooms..... but with mushroom walls
The mush-rooms? WHEN
lock me up and throw away the key
this is gonna cause massive allergies
i hope it's at least somewhat ventilated otherwise i'd recommend immediately getting an adrenaline syringe or you won't be able to breathe for the next 3 weeks
This does not look like an amateur operation where something as essential as ventilation would be overlooked.
These mushrooms aren't black mold or some other toxic variation. While its not really healthy to be in these rooms for too long, its not that different from a really dusty area like a sawmill.
Challenge: try walking to the end of that hallway without getting at least a demi-chub.
Is that like when Hercules gets a chub?
Sporkkake
Wall of wangs
You arr going to the penis wall
Debbie Does Malaysia
dongs
Maybe a lil sus... big old wall of di- perfectly delicious edible mushroom '-'
Ah I see. These mushrooms have [hbomberguy] extruded [/hbomberguy].
hbomerguy breaking through the wall to scream about aquaman, but the wall is mushroom tips
Dude look like he gon' pickafew then go into the Matrix.
How many would you choke on?
Yes
Just what it's like for your college average springbreakers
Please let them all release their spores.
In a row?
Dick wall
It reminds me of the room where Abstract Daddy is in Silent Hill 2.
Obligatory: if you know, you know.
I dont know what kind of mushrooms those are but I know they can punch REALLY hard
Uhh…
Anyone ever see Hitoshi Matsumoto's Symbol? Fun film and this is the first thing I thought of when I saw the pic.
A man is trapped in a surreal room where the walls are covered in "buttons". Each one he presses make something appear.
The buttons are cherubim angels baby penises and scrotes.
Wonder what the Help Wanted ad copy would read?
Why so bright?
Hey, some appendages look good in harsh lighting.
Doomsday mushroom vault
Mmm stallions
Look at all those dickens! (source if you don't know: https://youtu.be/F-X4SLhorvw)
They look like magic mushrooms, I have been growing them a few times as well. Just not on this scale haha
They don't look like shrooms at all... like not even a little bit. You're either lying or grew some other kind of mushrooms that isn't psychoactive, because none that are look like that.
Pretty sure these are king oyster mushrooms.
They indeed look more like those. The grow kits I had looked similar, hense my comment.