Thanks, that is a helpful perspective. I kinda just assume that any time I look at anyone it will be seen as creepy, but as you say it's not like I'm staring or even making eye contact usually. Although I probably would sheepishly feel like I'd been caught doing something wrong if I did make eye contact with anyone.

so... you're... pro-rape..?? and I thought I was fucked up.

reassuring to know that at least I'm not as far gone as that. So.. thanks!

Thanks for the link. I didn't relate to the framing of a "sex addition" or "porn addiction". But I did find it interesting to discuss "ogling" as a "habit", I guess analogous to tapping a pen or cracking your knuckles. In that framing it's something pointless and unproductive that you can decide not to do with some metal effort.

This part in particular stands out as relatable:

To be blunt (cause that’s just how I am), I quickly realized that my field of vision was breasts and butts. There was women everywhere . . . Moms, Daughters, Aunts, Sisters, and Friends everywhere, and all I saw were breasts and butts. The cool part was that I didn’t think I was ogling – it was just happening without any conscious awareness. It’s just where my eyes went with zero conscious awareness.

That's kind of exactly the passive ogling that I described in my post. I have made some mental effort to actively not look, but then I feel like my entire mind is concentrating on where my eyes are looking. I guess like any other habit it would take time to retrain my mind, and I'm open to that. It just seems kinda sad.