I can do without both.

I must state I lack any experience with parenting, but I have this to add:

Both Android and iOS have parental controls built in, just block whatever you don't want your kid to access. There are tools out there that parents can install on devices that are basically spyware for their kids. Parents have to actually use the existing tools, at least what is built in with the OS of the device. Make the iPad not an addictive content serving machine, but instead something with hand picked games, or whatever other apps you trust. Even non tech savvy users could enable parental features.

When you get big enough, you are under more scrutiny and these laws are spreading more and more. I can imagine the Mastodon team is under lots of external pressure to start following these new laws. Mastodon won't be the last to start thinking about implementation.

I hope it's face verification so I can just point the camera at a guy on Google images or whatever to get it to let me in.

The devs never patched the infinite money glitch.

That explains the "sync" logs I've been seeing! Is sync a good user experience?