Why does it seem like majority of men don't want to change/hold each other accountable for the better even though it could better alot of society if y'all did?
6d 14h ago by lemmy.world/u/WokeMammal420 in askmen
I hear, not all but alot of men claim they are the more logical of the sexes but if that’s the case why consistantly do illogical things? - like not hold each other accountable when blatantly trying to intimidate, oppress and assualt woman/children? For a progressive and healthy world isn’t that counter-intuitive when you help the division within the community instead of working together and going after the real enemy? Elites/mega corporations/corrupt government etc? Also do y'all know that some of you or ur friends/family are being groomed by other men in power?
The same reason women don't.
Because of the human bystander effect.
That is something that happens but woman are more likely compared to men to do something. Though both can be effected by the bystander effect.
I actually have.
yay!! Keep it at❤️
Most people by default tend to think they can do things better because we're shallow creatures and only look at the surface of those things.
What does it mean to be in a position of power? To gather all the benefits, decide who does what and what goes where. But do we see the competition, the rivalries, the sabotage in pursuit of one-uping the other? Do we see see the pressure of being in the center of attention at all times? To carry the burden of responsibility and required to be a model for others to follow? And to know that at the end of the day, one can do everything right and still lose?
Not everyone can be a leader, not everyone wants to share in the burden of responsibility. Because when things fail, and they do, it's the leader who has to fall on the axe.
Yet these positions of power, of leadership need to be filled. Those of us who know better, stay away, because we understand there are few benefits in that kind of position if you're not going to profiteer from it. The scoundrels, the liars and the crooks instead are all for it, as they care only for the benefits and the power, not the responsibility. So they lie, threaten and cajole, or even kill for it.
So the question you need to ask isn't why they the leaders. It's why aren't you? Think deeply and you'll find the answer.
You're not a leader, I'm not a leader and neither are most of everyone else. We let others carry the burden and put up with their inadequacies because we ourselves can't and won't take their place.
......yea sure, neither of us are leaders but the ones in charge are doing a shit job so it's our duty as team-mates, followers or whatever u wanna label it as to work together and call each other and the leader out bc shit is fucked up and if we hold each other accountable that means the betterment of the group because if we dont, the group fails and we all suffer.
Sure. I suggest we form something like a union and elect a leader to do that for us.
Yes and no, it's really more of both. Should we elect someone? Sure, but we should also account for some personal responsibility. One person can't hold all that weight it's not reasonable and also dismissive. Something goes wrong? Easy! Blame that person and not our own personal actions. It's like leading a horse to water, u can't make it drink but u can guide it there ya'know?
Sounding like a leader already. You should run for office!
Edit: Don't worry. If you get elected, we'll help you stay on the straight and narrow. You'll love it!
Whom are you asking? The name of the community is Ask Men, but you can't literally ask the collective. Because Men aren't a collective mind. If you narrowed it down to specific questions about specific men in specific situations, I bet that the answers would be more apparent.
Put another way, I wonder how much your idea of what it's like to be and function as a man in the world matches my experience of it. I'm just one man who never claimed we are more logical than women. How would I hold others accountable? How would I change them? (Trying to change others always works out so well, after all.)
Just as a for-instance, the whole "locker room talk" thing— what am I supposed to do about it? In day-to-day life, most boors aren't cartoon villains, like a certain famous leader. But, in my experience, the cartoonish ones get that way because they want to have sex. And they get it. They commodify women and sex because they somehow can get all the women and sex that they want. That's success by their standards; they feel that they have something that women want. If everybody is getting what they want, why would those men listen to anything that I have to say about it? Furthermore, there's no benefit besides the satisfaction of doing the right thing. The outcome is that I would get pushed out of the social scene by the men and women, because, well, those men do have what the women want, be it popularity, wealth, height, confidence, et cetera.
As for banding together to go after the elites, how is that a gendered thing?
The people you're describing very obviously don't care about the betterment of society. It's like asking Hitler why he didn't help the Jews get a leg up, why Trump doesn't help the country set aside their differences to work together, or Musk use his wealth to end homelessness.
It's basic avarice combined with an absolute indifference toward the struggles of others.
Do you or have you called out such behaviours like locker room talk or even brought up the topic about such things when ur with ur buddies?
I don't have any buddies and haven't been in a locker room scenario(any social setting with other guys) in over 30 years. So, no, I haven't called anyone out on their shitty behaviors.
Hmm. Can't say I blame u on being a recluse but to ur other comment, it wasn't all on Hitler. He was just the face of it. It was ur average day Germans who wanted to point the finger at someone else bc it was easier to blame their hardships on another group close to the ground like they were rather than the actual rich people up in the sky who wer causing it.
Locked due to multiple rule violations, but leaving it up as there was constructive discussion despite the troll.