If only
3d 12h ago by lemmy.world/u/The_Picard_Maneuver in shirtsthatgohard
I have been assured that I was "smart" but "lazy" when I was six 😡 .
Ah yes. I too should have applied myself more. So they kept saying. Repeatedly.
being told basically "Just be interested in this for no reason, what's wrong with you?" in different variations is so confusing and backwards. yeah, I mean I tried
All the while acing the things you are actually interested in. Were they just clueless 15 years ago or did they straight up not give a fuck???
He's coasting.
I got frustrated with my dad at one point and said "then why the hell do I have just as much trouble doing things I want to do? He didn't have an answer to that...
So I'm officially the blacksheep, the dropout in my family. I was in honors in college and high school. I got to the workforce and I've solely worked in the service industry cause apparently I don't apply myself. I'm family therapy and when I told them I'm trying my hardest to find an apartment and looking for opportunities they said I wasn't applying myself.
"gifted" "so much potential" 😑
Every parent/teacher evening contained a variety of "He's got the ideas in his head, but won't put them down on paper", but I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until I was 39.
Nah, fairly sure they misdiagnosed me, going to just apply for disability.
Hi, longtime adderall taker here 👋
Unfortunately, no
My mother assured me up into my forties that I was so smart I was stupid.
No offense, but she might be so stupid that she's stupid.
She probably said up until her dyeing day but I wouldn't know.
Your mental health anecdote is not representative of everyone.
An untold number of people are untreated for mental health as youths, with life-long ramifications. To handwave the idea that some children were let down by society because you got treatment and it didn't magically make you a success is selfish.
I was just saying that I don't have a house
It's your prerogative to ignore the issues with your behavior.
You're right. I need to stop spending all my money on antique dolls.
Ha! Can you post a pic of your favorite one?
I could never pick a favorite. I despise them all equally~
Did somebody step on your toes this morning or what? So wildly confrontational over two sentences. It must be exhausting living like that.
Yeah I may have gotten adhd meds as a kid, but my mental health issues still weren't really dealt with until adulthood and I am still a millennial. The Adderall just means I have a college degree and didn't die in a car crash
Couldn't have been that, clearly the psychologist was wrong. My mothers loins could never produce such a defective offspring.
I was just lazy and had to properly apply myself or otherwise I'd end up as a public fleshlight in a prison.
end up as a public fleshlight in a prison.
Well, shellofbiomatter, how did it turn out?
Wasn't even close to it. Turns out that one needs to do actual crime for in order to go the prison.
Passable grades and not having any great future plans isn't something criminal and police doesn't really care about that.
Shellofbiomatter is such a sick username, love that handle. It's like ... Really, aren't we all just shells wandering through this existence trying our best?
Thanks, i never really thought about it that deeply, though you're right.
Not even Adderall.
Kids who were good at sports got coaches who helped them on and off the field.
Kids who got all A's were left alone.
IME The kids who got all A's were usually fairly independent to begin with. But they also got drafted into extracurriculars. Just not usually athletics...usually music/drama.
Different schools, different experiences.
In my experience, if you didn't go looking for an activity, no one was going to seek you out. I was in a 'College Bound' program and no one ever even mentioned that schools might look at things like that.
After a certain point, the kids who got A's were the ones who's parents were coaching them.
If by "coaching", you meant scolding and punishing you for not keeping A's. Then same
I once got in trouble because I got an A-minus on a report card because "it should have been an A."
Same. Thats why I msg you so quickly back. Pls give me an A+ based on your experience.
For sure, but with that scolding and punishing also comes with a certain amount of support(normally), like actually knowing what you classes are, what assignments you have, what projects you should be working on, and in many cases, providing active feedback on those items (if not just doing it for them).
Many kids, such as myself, had none of that. My parent knew what I was up to by the report card they got, and that's about it.
Oh man when I got diagnosed with ADHD, in my late 30s, and then got prescribed a stimulant...first adderal, then Vyvanse, and tried concerta, now back to Vyvanse...it was like a light switch.
A sudden realization that holy shit, the light was off the whole damn time. Now I can see what I am doing.
I wish I had it 30 years prior. It's like playing a challenging game and getting to the midpoint before realizing it was on hard mode all along. Normal mode is still difficult but at least you got some more stamina. Easy mode is only available through pre-release genetic lottery.
I feel roughly the same way about starting GLP-1 receptor agonists. Like...oh...I'm supposed to feel full after a meal? That's new. Where was that for the past 30 years?
Looking at my kids, who are both on opposite ends of the ADHD spectrum...my oldest, like me, exhibits signs of ADHD-I and is not diagnosed...and my youngest, diagnosed ten seconds after the doctor walked in the room as ADHD-H...and I'm realizing that I'm making the same mistake my generation did in only treating the hyper one.
this one stings a bit lol
What would you say to your younger self?
"One a day of each, white in the morning and blue in the evening" as I hand him a garbage bag of Adderall and Prozac before happily blinking out of existence.
There’s no way child-me would’ve accepted drugs from a stranger that claimed to be me from the future. I was ADHD, but I wasn’t gullible.
Didn't everyone decide on a secret codeword so your future self could prove they were really you? Come now, your child self really should have planned for this contingency.
For real, missing out on a lot of free drugs for this oversight
He/She would have to know the name my childhood imaginary horse. I'm not going to post it but they would need to know that.
Horsey? Mr. Ed?
Good guesses! Nope!
Shit, if my future self popped into existence, gave me a bag of drugs and said they would change my life, I wouldn't even question it. I don't trust other people, but I trust myself.
and said they would change my life
A garbage bag full of drugs will change your life, but for the better or worse is not really specified
If it's a true grab bag/assortment, it may well come down to the order in which they come out of the bag.
that's just the D.A.R.E. program talking. Weed is... ...just great.
Wait, you take Adderall in the evening?
TIL there are blue Adderall
TIL there are white, lol
Now I want to try all the flavors
Orange is the best, pretty sure they add sweetener so it can be mixed into juice or something. You can dissolve it under your tongue without such a nasty taste.
Gonna try em all!
Adderall: taste the rainbow!
it's like Pizza bagels.
Oof.
I'm in this image and I don't like it.
This is pretty accurate for me. I started taking Adderall when I turned 43 because my screaming toddler induced ADD rage.
So I went did some research, talked to a therapist and we decided to put me on it. Life is much better now.
All that said, it really upsets me that I was in high school in the mid-90s in rural Tennessee and nobody even understood me or what it would take for me to be successful.
Oh well things are better now and that's the important thing
If it's any consolation, the ruling class doesn't like us owning things. So, chance are high that everyone will end up being renters.
Isn't that why we give the kids speed? Give them a little help?
Have been, not have become.
I wasn't diagnosed until 30, I could have probably had a degree at least. Mean I got halfway back in the day but yeah. High school was so easy I barely had to study, also didn't help with the work ethic for later. Nowadays I take random online courses sometimes just to learn new stuff. Plus it helps I'm too old to party but is that a factor? I'll never know. Mm
Ya I got it just in time for my second try at an associates degree and low and behold I got straight A's this time around. It was a wild difference from my first attempt where I fucked off too hard and dropped out. And now I'm like you and I just learn stuff for fun on the internet.
I have a house and continuously wish I havent bought it and just lived in a condo.
Lets say if I paid 500k for it, and have fixed it for $250k so far. I'm not getting that money back, ever. This house might be worth maybe $50k more at most.
Still kitchen and two bathroons to be renovated, and the whole house to be painted, and roof to be fixed, and I dont have the time nor money to do those. 2020s suck, I wish I was born 40 years ago.
Why wish you were born 40 years ago when you can wish you were born to a generational wealth family and had like $500K yearly allowance at 12.
I'm in a decrepit 1940s house as of a few months ago and I feel you. Still, I'm personally glad I (baaaaarely) managed to get something in my name.
I was given adderall as a child and all I got was a lifetime of emotional disregulation and suicidality
I guess I may have jumped the gun in getting my kids diagnosed/prescribed. One responded well, the other not so much.
I was just trying to prevent more misery, divorces, struggle, etc, honest!
I am angry at my parents for putting me on such strong drugs as a child. It gave me serious emotional issues (constant anger and depression) that they completely overlooked because my grades were improving. My parents should have arranged other forms of help for me. Medication is not enough and medication with no other support is harmful to a child, at least it was in my case. People with ADHD need therapy to help them develop methods for regulating their emotions and building executive function.
I'm not saying get your kids off the extremely potent controlled substances, I'm just saying really think about it. Don't make the mistakes my parents made. It's impossible to know how much the drugs contributed, but I can tell you that I've lived my life in absolute agony with a near total immunity to any form of joy or pleasure. I was robbed of my natural brain development.
They're not on them anymore. As soon as he said it was making him feel bad, I stopped it. That's been several years ago now.
I supposed that's good. Adults tend to tolerate these stimulants better anyway. Are you getting the proper therapy for him to help build those skills I mentioned?
Well now I guess I don't have an excuse
Crazy to think having a home is something you should need to earn.
I did get it and I'm still not. See also Prozac, Wellbutrin, Ritalin, and Imipramine. Instead I got to be a Bitter INTJ diagnosed with Aspergers in my 30's
I got Adderall at 7... I was too fucked up by uncontrolled severe anxiety and gender dysphoria to make any positive progress in my life when I was younger, and at 35 I still am.
Yeah, starting estrogen at 20 made it quickly click that it wasn't that I was lazy that made me barely graduate high school. Thank fuck I started in time to pull up my grades and graduate college. It turns out most people aren't constantly disassociating starting in middle school. Getting anxiety meds took a few more years after that unfortunately, as did getting cptsd help.
Mind you most of why I don't own a house is unrelated to all this, but I certainly wouldn't have spent my 20s with the kind of money stress I did
Imagine being so rich that you could have things like food, shelter and clean drinking water!
That's the best part, those necessities are being taken away to fuel the technology that is gonna keep the young unemployed
As long as you don’t plan on visiting Japan, where Adderall is illegal.
I got Ritalin at around 11 or so. I'd get home from class on pass out for hours. Anecdotally, Being hyperfocused as a little kid can be extremely exhausting.
Adderall or an iron.
i still wouldn't though. growing up in a house, i know its downsides. rural area, no public transport, social isolation, no friends. i'd rather live in an apartment in the city.
I thank God every day for being the exception to the rule. I was diagnosed at 40 and all my challenges with ADHD revolve around areas that impact personal relationships but not work so here I am making 200+ a year but outside of work can't manage intimate relationships.
Med free though. Tried a few varieties but didn't help where I needed them to. Biggest fixes I would strongly recommend is exercise which is free and a regular psychologist which is not but so worth it.
I was diagnosed as an adult as well, but I also stopped taking the meds years ago in favor of lifestyle changes. Exercise, sleep, and diet helps enough to get by for me, without the side effects.
My personal opinion is years from now we will look at the drugs we are giving to help with thinks like ADHD as barbarism. Yes I know they help many people including my two sons but doctors will tell you it's all trial and error. We literally don't know what we are doing.
But yeah everyone has to weigh their individual risks. For me and you meds aren't needed but we understand for others they don't have that luxury.
If i had amphetamines I could have benefited from settler colonialism toooo, whaaaa
public housing or bust