The transphobia stops now
2y 10mon ago by lemmy.blahaj.zone/u/ada in 196@lemmy.blahaj.zone
This community is housed on an instance run by two trans women, focused on the needs of the queer and gender diverse community.
We allowed 196 here because we were promised the community is queer and trans inclusive.
If you're here it's because you're aggressively supportive of trans folk. Not middle of the ground, not "just asking questions".
If your response to that is, "yes, but..." then this isn't the instance for you, and by extension, this isn't the community for you.
tl;dr - Unambiguous support and inclusion, or fuck off somewhere else.
--
Edit - I changed the phrase "aggressive support to "unambiguous support", as there was some confusion over the intent behind my previous phrasing.
Aggressive support given!
WHATS THAT SORRY I CANT HEAR YOU IM CRANKING THE HOG RIGHT NOW TRANSPHOBES GTFO (DISRESPECTFULLY) 🏳️⚧️
but it’s weird so its gonna happen
But it shouldn't happen.
"This is how things are" is a terrible excuse for why we should allow them to be that way.
Hopefully you're just being sarcastic tho
God I hope you forgot the /s
Yes, it IS not the norm. It's a minority. But that doesn't make it weird. Just because it's kind of rare doesn't make it a bad thing. It's been and still is the society that is making it weird for the people themselves. But I see a positive development to a more open minded and inclusive society, even tho the "angry people" who are against this are loud, they won't be able to stop it! And they know it, that's why they are so angry at everyone who's different as them.
It's good to be weird. Weird means not normal, not mainstream. I find not weird to be boring. So bring on the weird!
So with you on this, as a weird person I would not change anything even tho it sometimes presents challenges. Found a weird bf too and I'm in heaven
Right on. It's good to be in the minority, to be different!! It would be boring and if everyone were the same.
I have ADHD so there are always more people not like me than like me (unless I'm in a ADHD club or something lol). I could say I'm weird. But also I'm a different kind of normal. Who decides what is or isn't normal anyway right?
Anyway... The problem isn't being unlike some majority group. The problem is the fear and hatred and ignorance.
When it comes down to it we are all human.
Transphobes gtfo
Stick your hopes and prayers where you're food goes.
This is what the fediverse was created for. Casual transphobia doesn't need to be permitted and I fully support that.
Every single transphobe right now:
HELL YEAH 💖
Can you see my reply? I'm on lemmy.world and I thought it was still defederated from Beehaw so I shouldn't be able to see your comment O_o (I'm used to being more active on my beehaw account so using my lemmy.world account threw me off, disregard this lol)
P.S. Yay trans rights and having a pro-trans meme space 😄
Being defederated just means you can't see new posts on beehaw communities and they can't see your communities at all. If your instance and beehaw are both federated with a third instance, like the one this community is on, then you'll still be able to see comments by beehaw users on that instance.
Let me just make sure I got this right
Dee is on lemmy.world
Zoop is on beehaw
This thread is on lemmy.blahaj.zone
So Dee and Zoop can see each other's comments since neither lemmy.world nor beehaw is defederated from blahaj.zone?
It's like a border state or something
Accorded neutral ground
I can see Zoop's comment, but Zoop can't see mine. Because beehaw is defederated from lemmy.world but lemmy.world has not chosen to defederate from beehaw so it still gets the comments from beehaw users.
Actually because all these replies are to my lemmy.world account Zoop can't see this entire exchange, and I can't see it on my beehaw account either. I just had a brain fart.
Ah, okay. Because behaw defederated they're not seeing anything from lemmy.world. They're also not sending anything to lemmy.world. But they are sending stuff to blahaj.zone, so you can read that stuff.
I wonder if they're seeing my responses, from kbin, to your comments, from lemmy.world, on blahaj.zone.
I wonder if they’re seeing my responses, from kbin, to your comments, from lemmy.world, on blahaj.zone.
I cannot see anything from this conversation on my beehaw account, because it all stemmed from my original reply (which is from a lemmy.world account). So on beehaw it's just Zoop's original comment, nothing after.
Edit: For example on beehaw this post as 37 comments, while on lemmy.world it has 97 (at the time of writing this edit)
why did beehaw defederate from lemmy.world?
That's why. Which is to say they were getting too many reports from lemmy.world accounts to go through and keep the good vibes in their communities, but hope to refederate as soon as Lemmy gets more granular moderation tools developed.
I see, thank you
I'm not sure about that. I think it might be a glitch or something because I never see beehaw comments on lemmy.world and never see lemmy.world comments on my beehaw account. Like, I can't see the comment I made on this account from my beehaw account.
Just thought it was odd.
I was just being dumb, Monzingo is right.
I can see your comment, but I'm on mastodon.cloud. 🙂
Thanks, bud. It's nice to be seen 🙂
See Mozingo? Nothin'
(this comment makes more sense if you can see both lemmy.world and beehaw comments lol)
Okay, I had the dumbs. So because lemmy.world isn't defederated from beehaw, but beehaw is defederated from lemmy.world I can see the beehaw comments on lemmy.world but not the other way around.
False alarm, I got excited for a second there but had the dumbs. Carry on about your day.
Thank god. Reddit and Twitter were ruined by the transphobic and Nazis. Glad that isn’t tolerated here.
Thank you so much. We need that more than anything right now — where transphobic content tends to be the default on the web.
If this is the time to go full aggressive for our rights, count me in!
(And if you’re here to passive-aggressively complain about how you « don’t care about people’s sexuality » and making everyone notice you’re leaving — let me be very active-aggressive in saying « good fucking riddance » to you.)
heheh, i like this comment
"Not gay as in happy, but queer as in fuck you!"
TRANS RIGHTS 
There was transphobia in 196? HOW?
One of the mods made a post about how this comment being really creepy about trans men's bodies somehow wasn't transphobic and then deleted it after people started calling them out lol
Thank you for providing good context on this thread. The original comment was ass, but not important overall. If the mod hadn't decided to explicitly defend it, this wouldn't even be a conversation. This entire discourse would have been avoided if it wasn't for a shitty mod post.
The mod could have just... Not responded to it like they don't respond to thousands of comments. You're not listening to the point. If you're straight, don't fuck trans men because you view them as women because vagina and boob
You're missing the point. His point was explicitly that he wouldn't date post op trans men.
What you saying right now was literally his point. To date a trans man because finda him attractive for his femininity wouldn't work. That was literally his entire point.
Fuck off.
Genital preferences are valid as far as any preference for physical attributes but when you're reducing people to purely genitals it's gross and no respect needs to be given to the argument.
That's not what happened. In the context of dating and sex it's an extremely relevant point. Sounds like you're mad at a headline without reading the article, in a manner of speaking. So you fuck off.
The original comment literally boiled down to "boobs and vagina is woman, penis is man".
No it didn't. He explained he would be put off by a transitioned trans man. Go through their comment history and you'll see they'd be comfortable dating preop, as long as their partner is comfortable with them finding their femininity attractive.
That is not at all what it said. The original commenter said that he would not be willing to date a trans man after they transition because he cannot find a penis sexually attractive and because he does find boons sexually attractive. This is a completely ok thing to say, it's what was said after this original comment that became a problem. The post should not have been made by the mod, because it led to a lot of transphobes commenting.
Nedankinde. This is an issue we all care about, after all.
The guy said he wasn't into dicks and that it would be weird to like something about his partner that they would want gone and dislike. That's not transphobic. It honestly bonkers that people find that to be transphobic.
All in a day's work😉
Most people seem to agree it wasn't transphobia, but here's the context: https://lemmy.world/post/1893561
There was some transphobia that came crawling out like usually happens when a trans topic starts getting active, but they got shut down pretty quickly
There was some transphobia that came crawling out like usually happens when a trans topic starts getting active
That is what prompted this post. It happens every single time trans stuff comes up. There is no space for it here.
To be clear, some of the comments you removed were from the person you are now replying to.
Yes, I'm aware. You can see the list here https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/modlog?page=1&userId=170858
They were removed, because a meme community on a trans run instance isn't the place for a discussion on the specifics of why you don't want to fuck trans people.
We hear that enough, every day, in every place we look online. We don't need it here too.
Was the post transphobic? That depends on who you ask, but either way, what it wasn't is "unambiguously supportive"
It's also worth pointing out that those posts were not the trigger for this thread
a meme community on a trans run instance isn't the place for a discussion on the specifics of why you don't want to fuck trans people.
I really wish more people got this
It's like Pokémon, you made eye contact with someone on a meme sub and suddenly you're forced into a debate you don't want to have.
👀 Barbie or Oppenheimer? Answer me, Zymi!
It’s also worth pointing out that those posts were not the trigger for this thread
That's a relief! I was a little worried because I like this instance but was butting heads in the one post. Thank you for running this instance. I threw what money I can at the moment to the blahaj.zone Kofi because I feel bad I might've made your job harder as an admin lol
I was thinking about this in the context of a conversation I was privy to recently boiled down it was basically "I don't have a problem with trans people But...sexually assaulting kids is bad But...teaching sexual orientation to 3 year Olds is bad"
I don't want to have to feel like I need to "just leave"
The post seems transphobic in a "chaser" sort of way to me, not trans though.
It seems very "chaser" to me. In other comments, the poster mentioned how he was attracted to "post op trans women and pre op trans men". Grouping those two demographics together in this way will never be seen as not chaser.
What does chaser mean?
Someone who fetishizes trans people. You find trans people hot? That's totally fine, you can have preferences. But grouping post op trans women and pre op trans men sexually is saying that they're being viewed as women regardless of their identity.
If you wanna fuck a trans person, it should be because you're attracted to them. Maybe you like boobs and penis together and that's fine. Maybe you like a masculine chest and a vagina. You can be attracted to a certain intersection, even if that intersection is a straight one. But fucking them because they're trans and exotic is chasing. If you like women, fuck trans women. If you like men, fuck trans men. But don't just randomly flip them around like there's no difference to you.
The guy just said that penises put him off, good god. Is it common in the trans community for people to find it transphobic when cis people aren't attracted to them post transition? Because while I fully support the right to be trans and transition, that is pretty nuts to find it transphobic just because someone doesn't find you attractive.
That's not the issue. You can't say "yeah I like women" and then say that includes pre op trans men. That's fucking gross to say. He literally did the "oh noooo but your boobs!" You guys really go straight to being condescending before you actually try to understand anything, Jesus fucking Christ.
He said the boobs would be an issue in a relationship with a trans man because he would attracted to a source of the person's dysphoria, which would make them incompatible.
Someone literally asked for his opinion on this matter, in a post that invited the opinions of straight people. There is no grossness or transphobia here. Someone asked him if he would date trans men and he explained why they would be incompatible.
well, yes and no
to my personal experience, it can feel kind of transphobic, as being in the position of being rejected just because of your genitals, and not because of the rest of your personality and appearance/gender expression just feels wrong and mean somehow, but if I try to rationalize it, saying that such pereference is transphobic feels just as bad, as you cant force someones pereference
there needs to be said that the person did not see the implication of praising/complementing someones genitals that were the problem (in the case of the original post "And it would propably be difficult with me going 'I love your boobs' and they're always like 'I hate my boobs'"). As praising or giving a trans person a complement on the bodyparts which are a big part of their disphoria is just mean and very painfull for most of them (this was propably unintended tho, and I expect the original postter didn't think about this, but still)
[pre-anything transfem btw]
the person did not see the implication of praising/complementing someones genitals that were the problem
Wasn't that the point of the comment? They got asked if they'd date a trans guy and responded that it wouldn't work out because what they're attracted to is exactly what makes the trans guy dysphoric
Edit: the post the comments were under was a bit weird about trans though, I'd be fine with that not existing here
Most people expect sex within weeks. And no matter how great you find someone, if sex with them is a chore due to you not finding their sexual organs appealing(which is something you can't really control), that's not going to be an ideal relationship.
And on the point of finding something attractive about your partner that is the source of their dysphoria, that seems like a recipe for disaster and hurt.
I can understand how it doesn't feel great to read those points and how it's a talking point that you wouldn't want to see in communities you follow, but to call it transphobic just because it's hurtful just doesn't seem sound imho.
But in this case at least it's not simply boiling someone down to their sexual organs, but rather recognizing how their sexual organs could realistically affect the relationship.
Thank you. It was my first time hearing the term.
Honestly I didn’t realize this was a trans community. I thought ‘196’ was just some random number like the ‘4’ in 4chan. 196 just had good content. The fact it’s inclusive is just a bonus.
The entire instance lemmy.blahaj.zone is a trans themed instance therefore every community on it is slanted towards trans community and support.
That's partially to blame for all 196 communities having this weird "if you know you know" approach to writing their mission statement and rules. I've seen numerous people ask wth is 196 because of how vague the communities they saw were.
But, particularly about the social politics, here's also the thing I think. Trans rights are human rights. Communities fall under two categories: Welcoming to trans people, versus inherently evil. So I don't think that a community is pro-trans should ever have to be stated. It should be assume, and whoever has a problem with it should go fuck off from society, Satan has a place for them.
Tbf, this one does mention it on the about page, so it's more obvious to newcomers than r/196 was.
It's not a trans community per se, it's more of a more trans-friendly shitposting community. Like, I think, even now majority of posters aren't trans. And majority of content is not trans-themed, it's not traa. It's a good place if you don't want to see only trans-themed memes, but also don't want to see transphobia
Variety makes things better.
i am old and cis but trans shitposters are the best shitposters, this is indisputable. you have my support
100% based; Was already worried where this community was headed
BLÅHAJ Lemmy W
Which part
The part where
Damn straight queer.
I'm just your run-of-the-mill white cismale dude, but I know several trans people in real life including an old friend of mine and a 7-year-old kid across the street from me. Everyone deserves respect and dignity of life.
Hello, Based Department, we've got another Based Community here.
Trans rights are human rights!
Trans rights are women's rights.
Trans rights are men's rights.
Trans rights are human rights.
If you believe otherwise, you're doing nothing less than questioning the basic humanity of Trans people. And you can fuck right off.
Sad to hear that's been happening on Blahaj. Full and unambiguous support from me! 🐝
I'm mostly just a lurker in this community but here I go: Trans rights are human rights 👍
Making all the transphobes come out of the woodwork to get banned with this one~ Appreciate everyone's unambiguous support <3
🏳️🌈fuck your hate🏳️🌈
I don't subscribe to this community but I found your post in the top of my feed. And want people to know, you have my support. I think it's awesome that you're able to build this community.
I'm not going to be aggressive in any online discussion but I am very sensitive to the situation. My brother was a gay man who had lots of difficulties and ultimately took his own life. I will always wonder if society was different, if he'd still be here.
So I will never shy away in real life. I promised the memories of my brother to always be that change that is needed. I will be that cis dude who takes the time to try and change people who show me their bigotry.
I know people in real life who have transitioned. It's a very difficult process and anyone who feels that they need it, they should have access to it. The look of being comfortable in one's own skin afterwards is absolutely observable. I can only do what I can do but you will always have an ally in me.
I'd hug you right now if I could.
Trans women are women. Girldick is best dick.
Know that you are loved. ^And also sexually objectified. Sorry bout that... ^
-Sincerely a cis lesbian.
WHAT THE FUCK (RESPECTFULLY) FUCK UNAMBIGUOUS SUPPORT AGGRESSIVE SUPPORT TILL THE DAY I DIE MOTHERFUCK*R 🏳️⚧️
Thanks for this, honestly it was worrying how many upvotes some transphobic replies were getting.
Trans people are cool. Love em. Full human rights for everyone, end discrimination. This post, though, is obnoxious though.
Sending edicts out to the public is never the play. Use your sidebar. Moderate stuff. Make it cool to not be a bigot. But the second you start doing goofy shit like this, you're painting a target on your back and coming across way more fragile than you must actually be.
I personally have a policy about blocking any community that has admins who feel it necessary to try to police people's thoughts. As much as bigots piss me off, this isn't how people conduct themselves in a place that purports to be a safe haven. You don't patronize and denigrate the general public out of frustration, unless you want them as an enemy for some reason. The idea you needed you adjust your terminology in retrospect confirms how poorly you wrote your initial message.
Also, I have to say, "We allowed 196 to be here" is a curious statement. What exactly did you allow? Is opening a community a big endeavor? I've opened up a bunch, and never have I felt like I was owed someone for doing it.
Ban bad behavior. Don't try to tell people how to think. We have a word for the latter and it's not pretty.
Trans people are regular, real people. Like my college friend. Or my wife's HS friend. Or that one kind soul I worked with once.
I'm so god damn sick of all the hatred and lies and bullshit and murder and sadistic laws against trans people.
I loudly applaud any space that actively supports trans people and gives them a place free from hatred and assholes.
What the fuck, transphobia on 196?
Trans rights 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
FOR TRANSPHOBES ITS BECOME ECONOMICALLY NONVIABLE TO LIVE IN LOSER CITY BUT SORRY (SMUGLY) M*THERFUCKERS TRANSPHOBES NEED NOT APPLY 🏳️⚧️
Thank you! I followed 196 over here from Reddit when it moved and I appreciate you reaffirming its principles. I think the move to Lemmy paradoxically gave 196 more visibility to people who don't necessarily agree with those principles because its posts wind up so prominent on All, especially in smaller instances. It's kind of hilarious how many posts I've seen asking why people on Lemmy say "rule" all the time 😂
Edit: in closing, fuck transphobes
Will spend the next days reporting transphobes if necessary <3 best wishes from Germany
I'm glad yall posted this but I'm bummed it's no longer "aggressive." Anybody who pretends that the wording of "aggressive support" is concerning is probably afraid of triggering that aggression themselves... and they should be.
People were thinking that aggressive meant that they had to be explicitly active in trans spaces and talking about trans stuff. What I wanted to convey is that someone doesn't have to talk about trans stuff to post here, but if they do talk about trans stuff, it needs to be unambiguously supportive.
I however remain aggressively supportive, and will continue to ban bigots, reply guys and "just asking question" dog whistlers as soon as they appear :)
That's why people like me will continue coming here.
As an Asexual Gender-Fluid person with trans friends, I fully support this
Nobody deserves to be bullied or hated for simply existing. Transphobes go away! Trans rights are human rights!
Based.
Thank you for creating a safe space. I'm an ally to the LGBTQ+ community and am happy there's a space not for "everyone", but for those willing to accept trans folk and silence those against them (while having funny posts on it as well).
I'm here because 196 shows up on my feed and I really enjoy the memes.
I also have absolutely no problem with trans individuals or really any lifestyle anyone wants to live that isn't hurting anyone else.
That said, was there an incident recently on here that spurred the creation of this post? Did something go down?
Edit: Changed "bothering" to "hurting" because I frankly don't give a fuck about the feelings of the type of people that are "bothered" by LGBT+.
Heck yeah! Fuck Transphobia!
Remember; not supporting trans rights means you're on the same side as those using laws and judges to strip women of their autonomy around the world. <3
I loved the original 196 and how supportive it was for LGBTQ+ people. Also because it was hilarious. Keep rockin
Thank God. THAT post earlier was shocking me.
Trans rights!
I'm more of a casual user so I haven't seen the transphobia here but fuck transphobes and you should all have a place to feel safe.
Trans rights! Y'all deserve aggressive support!
TRANS RIGHTS!!! 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
TRANS RIGHTS ARE HUMAN RIGHTS
Just wondering what does 196 means anyway? Clueless lemmy user here.
Ps I'm ally of LGBTQ2S+.
Back on Reddit some dude and his roomates made a subreddit called r/195 (their dorm number). It only had one rule, when you visit, you have to post a meme. Eventually the public found the subreddit and started posting their own memes. It got huge and out of hand and some awful stuff started getting posted so they finally deleted the subreddit. That disappointed a bunch of people so a sequel was made, r/196. This community is a recreation of that second subreddit.
This should be in the sidebar so the lore isn’t lost.
196 was a shitposting subreddit back on, uh, Reddit, which had one rule - you had to post before you left.
It became known as a very trans-friendly shitposting subreddit and honestly probably one of the better shitposting subreddits in general.
Now it's migrated at least partially to the Fediverse.
All I know is that 196 communities have The Rule which is that you must post something before you leave.
Sorry if I'm being dense but how does that relate to transphobia? Do the messages they post tend to be transphobic or something?
Oh cool, I was getting kind of uncomfortable with how things were going, this sounds just right.
Damn straight. Us queers need to stand together and there can be no god damn LGBTQ+ without the flippin T.
It was the only (as far as I know) general shitposting community on reddit that wasn't casually racist/homophobic/transphobic, because of this a lot of LGBTQ+ people flocked to it for their memes.
Honestly, I have no idea. We ended up with this community during the massive reddit migration because we are a queer focused instance, but I'm not sure of the history. I didn't even know the community existed before that :)
I have no idea what the history of 196 being queer is, but it was an extremely queer subreddit. I think it has something to do with how many trans people also happen to be shitposters.
iirc, for awhile the first and only user flair available on r/196 was "trans rights"
Based
Hmm that explains it then. Thanks for the info!
Trans rights are human rights. Trans people's existence doesn't get to be dictated on other's whims, or have their validity be aproved by other's checklists. Trans people get to live and be respected. Dismissing someone's right to live that literally is just trying to exist peacfully just because you don't feel like treating them as a human being says everything. I want to have trans people feel safe in their environments,whichever that is (online or irl), and we can't achieve that unless we're vocal, straightfoward and fierce in our activism for trans rights. Because trans rights are human rights. Thank you for being here and being a part of this community.
You have my full support.
As a.. whatever the hell I am.. I support everyone to be who they want to be. No exceptions.
As far as I know the original subreddit this com came from was very trans, to the point where I, as a cis straight ally, was nervous that I was somehow not supposed to be in it. And I'm pretty sure I wasn't the only one.
So I'm witchu
I must have good filters or something, because I don't think I've noticed any TP / TERFing in here. Sad.
(of course i follow from a mastodon account so i probably miss a lot of stuff)
Just so you know, before I say anything, I am happy that you've joined this community. I don't want anything I say to seem like I'm discouraging you from participating. The overall point of what I'm about to say is that this should be a trans community. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable because you don't know if you're allowed, but at the same time I wish that non-queer people as a group had to have a moment of empathy of "oh this place isn't for me". It's a similar fear to how trans people feel in men's and women's spaces
196 is extremely trans oriented at this point, to the point that I'd consider it a borderline trans community. I like that it isn't fully trans though. You know how often cis people have a monopoly on the conversation on a distributed community? There's nothing necessarily wrong with cis people having that control, but why can't trans people have that same space? Other people are allowed of course, but if we have to enter a separate reality for other people's communities, other people should have to enter ours. There's no way for us to force an equal medium, the best way we can enforce that is by wanting empathetic but easy experiences for other.
You realize trans people are only 1 percent of the population normally right? Trans women representing 15 percent of the group is quite a large demographic.
Edit: sorry this sounds condescending, didn't mean to make it so. Just explaining that statistically, there are a ton of trans people on here.
I guess I don't know why you need to bring this up.
I'm fully aware this forum has a lot of trans folks in it. And I am happy to embrace that. But up till now there hasn't been any "please no cis folks" pressure in it, either.
It's not like 196 started out as a trans space. And there are definitely a lot of places that were. And I would tread very lightly in them if at all.
Is it even a bad thing for trans and cis to mix and enjoy things together? Isn't that, like, positive?
Sheesh.
It's not "no cis folks" it's asking to recognize that this is a trans space, on an explicitly trans Lemmy instance. Cis people can participate here the same way trans people can interact with cis spaces. If we want to enjoy it whatsoever, we just have to accept a certain level of shittiness to conform to those social standards. I'm saying that in a space where there are 30x more trans people than average, also on a dedicated trans server, yeah this is an explicitly trans space at this point. You may not like that, but I hate how Lemmy.world is pretty much entirely dominated by cis people, it is what it is.
Cis people can come here, they can even make their case for things they believe. People of different perspectives add to communities. Monoculture is never good. However, there needs to be some empathy in the way we feel like we're walking on eggshells anytime we're not talking to other trans people. We both feel like outsiders in the same way, and I don't necessarily like that, but I also don't think there's any way to actually explain that in a truly applicable way. Lived experience goes further for empathy than anything, yk?
I would be sad if trans folks stopped communicating naturally in this space because in my opinion that's the main reason that makes the space worth being in.
TRANS RIGHTS FUCK YEAH 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
Also people remember to report assholes! Don't interact, report them. Mods will handle it.
thank you so much for making this clear again ada, it was getting bad :(
Joining most of the people here in saying, "Huh, what community?" I'm not against trans people, and I despise bigots, but I'm not a part of your community either.
To be honest I don't care to be part of any federated community that defines itself by what it won't tolerate, grow up and use the block feature.
Yes, but….I don’t even know what 196 is. It shows up on my feed and is sometimes funny. I’m just clueless, not a bigot.
196 is a random content community with the simple rule of "post before you leave", so its filled with memes ^.^
It's also a very trans friendly place. But there was a thread recently with a bunch of "just asking questions", and "trans people are just oversensitive", and "I'm not a bigot, but most trans woman have a chip on their shoulder so I am no longer friends with them" kinda stuff, on a post a (trans) mod made complaining about people reporting a pretty questionable comment.
Even if people disagreed over the original comment, the thread about it ended up being transphobic as fuck.
So presumably the admins of lemmy.blahaj.zone (a trans-run instance, who host this, main, c/196 community, on the promise it would be very trans supportive) noticed the lack of moderation of that transphobic thread and are doing something about it ^.^
Appreciate the context! When I first started seeing the posts it seemed like something I liked but I was slightly afraid from not understanding the backstory. So glad to hear that it’s a wholesome place. I feel safe subscribing now.
It's a random memeposting group that happened to evolve into a trans
oriented memeposting group.
It started with /r/195, which closed or something, so sequels were created e.g. /r/196, /r/197... kind of like Oceans Twelve ig
Mostly. r/197 wasn't really a sequel to r/195. It was mostly made up of people banned from r/196.
Source: I'm a former r/196 mod.
Lemmy is in a weird state. I appreciate not seeing casual homophobia/transphobia in mainstream places like 196, but they're also not exactly inclusive of actual out-and-grown-up queer people, and there aren't enough people here yet for actual safe places to exist. I posted a comment self-referentially calling myself (a trans woman ) a "f-----" or something, and it got downvoted and deleted. This was a problem on reddit, where transphobes would report trans people for using self-referential slurs, and tone deaf reddit admins would ban their accounts. Now it seems like we're going to do it again here.
I'm here because this showed up in all.
I don't "aggressively support" squat. I do stand up for life, liberty,and the pursuit of happiness. Someone being trans does not affect anyone's life, liberty, or pursuit of happiness until they get aggressive.
Go go go. I’m so sick and tired of the hatred, the ignorance and frankly speaking, the stupidness.
I’m from a culture that is not very forgiving and tolerant, even though on the tin it says we are.
And it took me years to see and understand it. Now that I’ve conquered that ignorance, hell no we are not going to regress!!
Wait, what happened?
From what I can tell, a stupid thread made by a confused cis straight person who was talking about why he wouldn't have sex with a trans man. Then some transphobes showed up and were banned.
This instance is a safe space for sexual and gender minorities. If cis people want to talk about their sexual preferences with regards to trans people, there are a million and one other instances to do so in. This space is not the place to do so. It should go without saying that nothing that could even be perceived as mildly insensitive towards trans people should be tolerated here. This instance should be one place we can frequent without ever having to deal with any kind of cis and straight nonsense.
I think it's totally legit to say you're not attracted to a particular body configuration. It wasn't OP that bothered me, it was all the turdbuckets who showed up to pilot on.
I think it's fine to have sexual preferences, but it's a bit weird to post about it, especially in a space heavily occupied by trans people. It would be like a white person going into a space, made for and occupied by black people, and talking about how they'd never want to have sex with a black person.
While the base point is fine, it raises the hackles because of the manner in which it's put forward and the context.
It bothered other people, and its just not the place to have that discussion. Like I said, this instance is a safe space for sexual and gender minorities. That's the intent of the admins of lemmy.blahaj.zone. And its the reason I chose to join here. There are other spaces on lemmy for cis people to talk all about all the different ways they do or do not want to have sex with or date trans people.
Was the OP a blahaj account, or someone from a different instance?
Does it matter? As long as you're not harassing or hateful towards people and you grant them their freedom to exist as they want, there is nothing wrong with having a preference.
Cis people have every other fucking space in the world. This one is meant to be safe for gender minorities. Cis people can go to any of the other instances on lemmy and talk all about their preferences with regards to trans people.
A member of the community specifically asked for his opinion.
Nobody is asking for your opinion but you keep butting in with concern trolling even after people explain the issue to you. Fuck off dude
You don't understand what concern trolling. I'm not concerned about anything. I disagree that the initial comment was transphobic. Quit making shit up to be mad about.
That doesn't change literally anything. No one on this instance should be encouraging that, and it should be removed when and where it comes up. Again, this isn't just any instance its one meant to be safe for us specifically. I don't care who brought it up, cis people discussing their sexual preferences towards trans people can do so on any of the other instances that are not safe spaces for us.
Then stop inviting cis opinions into your community. People asked do he answered. It's that simple.
I never did invite cis people to talk about their sexual preferences here, trans people are not a hive mind 🙃 its also not my community, the two women who do own and run it have said outright this is a safe space for us.
Both the post and specific comment in question were the result of members of the community inviting the opinion of straight people.
Talk to the admins and mods🤷♀️
Did you... read the post that we're presently commenting on?
Yes. What's your point? The author of this post agrees that the comment in question wasn't transphobic.
Read it again. I never said the straight person was being transphobic. I said this is not the community for that. The admins agree.
I get sexualized and fetishized by cisgender men and women literally everywhere I go. Every space, every community, every platform. It's never ending and I cannot fucking tell you how many times in my life I've had to deal with reading random unprompted opinions about how fuckable or unfuckable I am. This is not the space. This is not the community for it. Are you trans? Are you a gender minority? Do you have any frame of reference for what this is like for us?
It's an open forum, and clearly some members of the community disagree since they are inviting opinions. Your options is to convince the admins to only federate with lgbt instances, or to make your own. Or maybe the mods can do that country club only type posts like in some reddit communities.
The community is not simply an open forum, it is made by and for gender minorities. This isn't something the admins are taking votes on. The opinion of the admins is that this is a safe space for trans people.
And I'm not interested in compromises. Again, you have no frame of reference for what this is like. In all due respect, you're talking to trans people about things you do not understand as though you do in any way understand them. You also have like 6 different comment threads going on all with trans people in this community who also expect this community to be correctly moderated to fit the standards of a safe space for trans people. So you've accused me a couple times of thinking the OP of the other thread was being transphobic. I havent said that. I said that this is a safe space for trans people and if people want to talk about how fuckable or unfuckable trans people are they can do it elsewhere. I don't care who started it, this isn't the place for it.
It is an open forum. When members of the community invite the opinions of straight people, they are able to see that and respond. It's up to the admins and moderators to lock that down.
Not from this instance and not a contributor to this community, but just wanna say great job.
Protecting the ideals of your instance is definitely a worthy goal, and I definitely include trans people in the category of people who get shit on undeservedly from on high and deserve way better.
Somewhat relevantly, I've long since wondered what even is the use of a patriarchy if men still can't wear skirts and nail polish.
🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
Just read the post that started this all. I thought that hating a person for having a sexual preference that doesn't agree with you, it's exactly what the queer community was fighting against. Well you do you. Plus demanding aggressive support only is in really poor taste. Great job making a meme thread into political crap. Yes, let's burn down everything because I don't agree with a part of it.
You're the one commenting on this instance. They manage it and can make the rules. I for one am happy to have a space where I don't need to worry about assholes making creepy comments about their sexual preferences and casually bigoted opinions.
For real, I love the way Lemmy works so much. It makes it so much easier to keep out bigots and creepy folks
This instance wasn't a political sub. This was for the memes. A person stating their sexual preference isn't being creepy. Just cause that one's person opinion isn't liked doesn't mean they can be piled onto. Of course when you start stating extremist views you will get people that say the opposite no matter what. That's what happens when you start hate. You get hate back. I guess you haven't read the original thread.
I still have no idea how these communities are set up structurally. That said I'm quite pleased to see this as the community baseline. Stumbling into inclusivity is the best kind of stumbling.
Hi! Trans person here. Your heart is in the right place, but this post is poorly written. You haven't even given examples of how this is currently/could be applied. Some people are just that uneducated about trans people. If they're leading questions that invalidate us, sure. But otherwise what's the harm? For 196 there's no reason to ask about that stuff but the whole instance?? Your call in the end but I can think of a few ways this could go bad just from prior experience in other communities.
AGGRESSIVE SUPPORT FROM AN ENBY QUEER WEIRDO! I SUPPORT YOU FAM.
FUCK YES! I'm so glad to see this, the comments on some of those posts recently just gave such an ick feeling. Fuck transphobes. All hail glorious blahaj!
Trans rights!
Not on your instance but it's so good to see unequivocal inclusion and support for the trans community. There should be no room for bigotry of any kind.
I'll be honest I think alienating people feeling in the middle is a bad idea, making an echo chainber is ehat those other websites are for, and people on the middle ground are the ones whose beliefs matter the most as they they are the only ones that will change things.
Fuck yeah 🏳️⚧️
I support!
Genuinely thank you. This community just existing as it does has already helped me a fucking weird amount.
You tell em Ada!
Full support here 🏳️⚧️
But muh discussion with both sides! 🤨🤔 That's not very tolerant of you, guess we know whose the real baguette now. 😤
I used to be on the original 196 two years ago, cause it really was 99% supportive. But it has simply devolved into fetishization over time.
You have my utmost support even though I am not even on your instance. Just saw it in the federated feed :p Stay strong LGBTQ+ 💪💪💪
Personally, I don't think about other people's sexuality all that much, so I guess that makes me a non-aggressive supporter.
It's weird to impose this type of stuff, but I respect that this is your little space on the internet, so I'm leaving, as you asked. Thank you for the smiles and laughs.
trans is not a sexuality
That's for the clarification! Like I said, I'm not super into this whole topic
“I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's greatest stumbling block in his strike toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to 'order' than to justice.'
Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Not to equivocate trans and black liberation because they are very different, but do you think “aggressive” or “non aggressive” supporter of race rights better slots into the whites who demonstrated their unwillingness to go along with racism or the ones who were like “I don’t care about your race, I’m not a racist, but how dare you ask me to support you in any meaningful or visible way?”
That's a quote from his letter from Birmingham jail, right?
While there are, of course, major differences in trans and black liberation, I read the full letter again recently and was shocked at how much of it was applicable to the current trans rights movement. I actually get the feeling that the two movements are more alike than they are different.
History repeats itself. I highly encourage everyone to take a half hour and read the full letter. Maybe if everyone took his words to heart, we could avoid some of the bullshit this time around. The conservative playbook of oppression hasn't changed much. It's just focused on a different target this time.
I agree that there is a great deal to be learned and analogies to be drawn. However, I’m not a person of color so I didn’t want to unilaterally co-opt a movement that isn’t mine to take.
Completely fair, and I totally agree! I'm also not a person of color, so I hope my comment didn't come across as trying to co-opt the movement. Just wanted to, as you said, point out there are a lot of similarities and lessons that could be learned.
I, as a trans person, fully recognize that black people had it worse than trans people do now. While both communities face violence, black people faced violence that was heavily state-sponsored and far more widespread, even with the recent increased rates of violence against trans people. The entire U.S. legal system was rigged against them from the start. It was their blood that earned us the Civil Rights Act, which is the foundation our movement needed. And that's a debt we will owe forever. And I also recognize that people of color continue to face discrimination. The fight isn't over, for any of us.
I'm getting wordy. I think we're both on the same page here. I guess civil rights discussions get me going (but tbh, I'm okay with that). Hope you have a great day!
Good point! I do think it's important to support trans rights, but I'd be a hypocrite if I said I AGGRESSIVELY support the cause. There's just a lot going on in my life right now, I just want to keep a clear mind, is all.
That being said, I never agree with or accept signs of transphobia.
What I mean by aggressively is, without caveats, without "but..."'s, without ambiguity. Your support needs to be clearly on the support side.
You don't need to be an activist. You don't need to be out marching or even commenting on trans stuff, but your opinion on trans folks should be unambiguously on the "support" side of things.
Oh, that's a much better description. I think I'll stay for longer then, thank you!
Yeah. If someone is ever writing out "I'm an ally, but..." literally nothing good ever follows.
Thanks for replying. I don’t know OPs intent when they said aggressively, but I can’t imagine your description not fitting into some reasonable definitions of allyship. Most people (even queer people) are not hauling themselves to every protest. Calling out transphobia as uncool when seen is as aggressive as anybody needs, imo. I wouldn’t get hung up on the wording.
I don’t know OPs intent when they said aggressively
MILITANT SHITPOSTING
SEIZE THE MEMES OF PRODUCTION
Thanks, I think you’re right! One of those words that somehow formed the wrong definition in my brain. TIL
Aggressive support. I'm with ya.
Be friend of Blåhaj
Trans rights!
I get the sentiment but damn are the trans memes painfully unfunny. Y'all gotta get better at making memes or this instance is gonna remain mid.
k bye
You sound salty. If this is really such a "mid" community, why do you waste your time on it?
I don't, funny memes pop up in my feed, I laugh and move on. Unfunny memes pop up in my feed and I move on. Unfortunately this sub seems to be targeted to me but I don't subscribe.
Oh stop the transphobic shit already!
How was what I said transphobic in anyway.
I’ll aggressively guzzle to that
Basically, if you're not in their bubble of bullies they'll bully you out of the instance and you don't even need to be offensive for that.
Yeah I have no problem with you being trans, I do have a problem with this goofiness. Good luck, friends.
Defining people against hate speech is goofiness?
That isn't at all what this post says.
TRANS RIGHTS AND SHÖNK
You have my support one million percent. No one has a right to threaten or intimidate anybody just for existing; we won't allow it.
Well said. Keep being awesome!
What caused this post?
A kerfuffle: https://lemmy.world/post/1893561
That was underwhelming
That linked to post was a response to an existing ongoing discussion that brought transphobes out of the woodwork. That post also had transphobic replies, and there were multiple discussions going on at once with active transphobes.
It was the ongoing transphobia that occurred around the initial discussion that prompted my post, not any specific single post.
I remember seeing the original post, it was in response to being asked if they’d date a trans person wasn’t it?
It was, yes.
But you need to be aware, cis people talking about the reasons they are valid in not wanting to fuck trans people is something we see all day, every day. It's normalised for people to just volunteer how unfuckable they find us.
And whilst that discussion might have some valid spaces in which it can be talked about, a meme community on an instance run by two trans women is not that space
The original post was an image with the text "Hey you, straight dude: are you attracted to women or to femininity?"
I posted a response that said I like boobs & pussy, and then someone (who turned out to be ace, and just was curious) asked if I would date a trans man.
Yeah, I know. I saw the context.
Your post was removed because I wanted that whole line of conversation dropped, not specifically because of your single post.
Also, it's worth noting that your post was not the trigger for this thread.
That's totally fair, the whole conversation was getting out of hand
I have a feeling that this has a lot of room for individual interpretation. I’m aware that the world out there is insanely hostile towards trans-people, it’s just that… asking things about the LGBTQ+ -communities consensus or what the thoughts on the scientific community are… feels kinda like a minefield tbh.
I am here for shitposts, but this is real isn't it?
<3
Thank you, based mod
if you've found a few legitimately bad actors here, then ban them and move on. don't burn the place down.
when i see someone from one space advise about how to safely access procedures or drugs that are illegal in some country, and then i tab to 196 to see that same person on the receiving end of the most harshly worded accusations of transphobia, i'm sort of at a loss for how to respond to that.
No one is burning anything down.
No tolerance! Trans love ❤️
Legitimately just curious here, but what does "aggressively supportive" mean in this instance?
Wooooooo fuck em up!
-queer-af enby
Awesome. Thank you!
i love trans righhts so much omg
Aggressive supporter!! Trans rights are human rights.
Yell yeah!
o shit. what did i miss?
I said a thing: https://lemmy.world/post/1893561
I wouldn't say "aggressively supportive" is what I am but I do definitely support trans people any way I can!
Keep up the great work!!
Aggressive support 🫡
thank u i appreciate it
-trans hyper nerd nikki
I want aggressive support, but I don't want to cut my ding dong off
And literally no one ever has told or asked you to
:)
Agreed no transphobia
I only saw this post because its on all
Maybe you dont want to be on all if this is your stance
Edit. The tone above is not hostile or pithy. I thought there was a dont show this community on all option. I have been informed that it isnt a toggle or opt out feature.
I apologize for any confusion my comment caused.
all is literally every instance. You're basically asking them to defederate or completely shut down their instance. If you can't handle opinions like this, you can either petition your instance to defederate from this one or stop going to all.
Human rights are human rights, no matter who you are
Did something specific happen ?
Critical Support
Sorry, but I do need to ask a verry sticky question, thats because I need info about those who attacks our community. If I am in the wrong place, please show me where I can post.
post mockup
The videos that are cited on the news constantly for "corrupting the youth with trans ideology", where are they from and are they real? they never cites sources.
Edit: its good to see a community like traaaans on lemmy, a place thats accessable to me, reddit needing the that much personal info put me off.
Ohhhh you are that crazy person that loves to censor the shit out of anyone who dares speak out against your insanity
I legit don't care, I'm simply here for the memes
ENBY Anarchist here. I'll gladly take my ban.
🤟😊🖕 🏳️🌈 Facist
I'm sorry what Are you trolling right now Also anarchist and fascists are not the same thing at all
Also anarchist and fascists are not the same thing at all
I think they're saying they're an anarchist and calling Ada a fascist for taking this stance, at least that's how I read it.
Hmmm ok
Just to clarify I don't agree with them, only trying to explain the dumbs. I'm unfortunately fluent, you see.
I read it as 🤟😊(I love you) 🖕(fucking) 🏳️🌈(gay) Facist
I guess I might just not be hip anymore. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Please remove if this post is not appropriate!
I'm a queer anarchist 😂 It's not that complicated. And yeah.. You start telling people they need to aggressively support something or get out.. I'm calling you facist.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I'm sorry keep on being you!
If you ever enter my home, know that I aggressively support not taking a shit in the kitchen, and, if you enter my home, I want you to aggressively support not taking a shit in my kitchen.
I'm not a fascist, just a decent person. Don't like it? Don't enter my house.
Now imagine my house is an instance/server, and "shitting in the kitchen" is bigotry.
I'm willing to commit to not shitting in your kitchen. 💜 No thanks needed.
Oh yeah ofc dw
☝️☝️☝️
👏👏👏
💜
Fucking hilarious! I didn't get banned! Common mods, don't you stand by your values? I'm not "aggressively pro trans" or whatever so let's do this! Ban the ENBY.
Firstly, I updated the post to clarify. You might want to re-read it
Secondly, unless you start posting transphobia, this post isn't about you. I won't be banning you simply for disagreeing with me
sorry, are you accusing OP of being a fascist?
????????
While we’re at it, can we also ban the word “queer”? 🤮
Why? A lot of people, like myself, have reclaimed it and use it to describe themselves. As long as it's not used in a negative or derogatory way, like as an insult or name calling, I don't see the problem?
Queer is awesome.
Also a lot of the "discourse" against it a few years ago was spread by terfs sooo yeah.
I like "queer" personally because it's more inclusive
And easier to say
What a great choice of name for a troll fascist. Thank you for signposting clearly why people should ignore you - will save a lot of time and effort.
Why?
Sure, lets also ban adolf